Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Golden Rain Tree...of DEATH.

"I ate some of your tomatillos," Theo mentioned as he casually leaned up against the counter in the kitchen, happily reaching for a peach from the bowl. "Off of your tree."

This caught my attention for two reasons:

1. Tomatillos don't grow on trees, and

2. I DIDN'T PLANT ANY TOMATILLOS.

"Did it look like a little green tomato?" I asked him. His eyes got shifty. "Well...it had those papery leaves..." and he pointed out of the window, at a definitely NOT tomatillo tree. "Those are just seed pods," I said. He started to look a little concerned. "Jackson ate them too." Now Jackson was interested. "I only ate them because Theo made me! Plus, I spit them out."

The next day Carrie and I were catching Sydney up on recent happenings and told her about this little escapade. She decided to do some research and looked the tree up online. "Aww, it's called a Golden Rain Tree. How pretty! That's a nice name," she said, scrolling lazily down the screen. Suddenly her face fell. "Although many people believe it is just the flowers that have the toxins, the whole plant is poisonous, including the seeds, pods, flowers, buds, leaves, petals, wood, bark, and roots." She continued, "The seed pods are the most toxic. Symptoms can progress from vomiting and diarrhea to dilated pupils, coma, and death."

In unison, we all turned our heads in slow motion to look at Theo, who was upside down on the couch eating a popsicle, pretty clearly not dead. "Number 5 on the world's most poisonous seeds list," said Sydney. We called Theo in and informed him of his brush with death. "You're the boy who lived!" said Carrie.
 "I'm Harry Potter, y'all," said Theo. "We should run some tests. Which cousin do we like the least?"