Tuesday, August 27, 2013

pain and foolishness

"Pain and foolishness lead to great bliss and complete knowledge, for Eternal Wisdom created nothing under the sun in vain."
Khalil Gibran 


so this is an accurate transcription of me and jack doing homework:

me:  ok jack.  read this 
jack: this?
m: yes.  this right here.
j: right now?
m: JACK!
j: ok! ok!  sheesh.  'when is your birthday?  write it on the line."
m:  so when is your birthday?
j: may 9th
m: ok write 'may'.  right here (me pointing).
j: should i draw a capital M?
m: yes.  right here.  go.
j: i like M's with curvy tops, not pointy.
m: that's fine.  capital M, with curvy tops.  right here.  put your pencil right here.
j: (draws an M)  
m: ok what's next?  a and a y?
j: did you know that my friend dillion can do the monkey bars and he SKIPS ONE!  it is so cool.
m: JACK!  finish your homework!  A and a Y!!
j: ok.  then can i have a cookie?
m: no.  you already had one.  now you have to finish this page of homework or you will sit in that chair for a long time.
j: (writes an a and a y)


 in case i have lost you, or you have fallen asleep, he has now written the word 'may'.


m: jack!  look here.  HEY!  write a 9 right here (me pointing).
j: with two dots?
m: (confused)
j: MOM!  with two dots or no?!   you NEVER LISTEN TO ME!!! 
(he throws his head down on the counter and cries)
m:  what are you talking about?!  i don't know what two dots you are talking about.

j: (yelling) DO I DRAW MY 9 WITH TWO DOTS OR NOT!! JUST TELL ME!  CUZ I AM GOING TO BE STUCK IN THIS CHAIR FOR - EV- ER  CUZ NO ONE EVER LISTENS TO ME!!

(me walking away)

j: MOM!! i am sorry i need your help!  mom mom mom.
m:  jack.  it is asking you to write a nine.  it is just like a backwards P.  remember?  write it.  
RIGHT. HERE.
j: do i leave a space?
m: (trying to find my happy place) where?
j: between the Y and the 9?
m:    yes.
j: (he writes a 9)

m:  ok.  what does the next question say?
j: 'tell about something you like to do".....

me:  TTIIIIMMMMMMM!!!!!


same conversation 3 hours later with an exhausted, crying darcy...

m: what genre is this?
d: i don't know!!
m: well it is 3 pages long.  is it a novel?
d: i don't know!
m:  it is three pages of paragraphes and story.  is it a poem or a short story?  darcy!
d:  i don't know!


this year might kill me.

Sunday, August 11, 2013

summer 2013

theo not jumping in on the group cannonball
oaxaca's with dad and kathy
Auberry volleyball
Campsite triumph!
theo calling me "my beth"
Road trip to SLO for "Much Ado" with Mark and Bry.
rachel and mom's trip to china/tibet
party barge! Gwen driving the boat.
Making a birthday cake for Mark Porter
river day at squaw leap- colin jumped off a high rock!
the moving company moving everything to Thailand EXCEPT carries shoes
baby hal's face when trying a lime
gordon's chocolate cake
v beating c in armwrestling. Badly.
playing "beat the parents" board game and...the kids beating the parents. twice
watching much ado about nothing, indiana jones, and Star Trek.
carrie throwing a "boy party" while beth was at girls camp
Searching for missing chickens that didn't actually exist
Sitting in the tree outside of the Prather post office, eating Little Debbies
mom home from china!!
smoothie bar at dad's house. Natural beauty additive.
jerry throwing the aerobie for the jumping kids to catch in dad's pool
bro's in law rowing the canoe very stalwartly
vivian giving darcy a haircut
Theo's hair in general

quotes:
"Why does my mouth taste like plastic?" - Lucy, shortly after her first Little Debby
"Roller skates!"- Connor Dunkle
"my thumb was not as powerful as i would have wished" - ShamaraWhittington, volleyball
"get your own feet!" - darcy's friend sleep talking at camp
"I can handle the violence, I just want there to be some logic involved."-Lucy, on playing with her brother.